Is there anything better than reading your newsletter, copy-pasting DOZENS OF SENTENCES into a little desktop note because they hit so hard, being too excited to comment and thank you for your writing that it distracts me from fully reading the piece itself so I have to slow down and re-read many parts, AND THEN SEEING MY NAME AT THE BOTTOM OF SAID PIECE. Thank you. I'm tingling.
"No amount of self-care, no matter how skilled, can make up for the fact that the nuclear family unit is a tool of nation states to keep women oppressed, to keep men in positions of power, and to keep the engine of capitalism humming along." Check, check.
Hi there Fanny, another great post, thank you so much. I appreciated the quote from Kai Cheng Thom very much because this has been on my mind a lot lately, reading about techniques for regulating or managing or controlling the nervous system, and I've had the same thought over and over that it feels like control, not listening to. If I realize I'm in flight, I don't want a technique to go to "regulation" because that just puts off trying to connect with myself to ask how I'm feeling that, where I'm feeling it, how do I connect with the part of me that triggered the flight response. The nervous system is the messenger, not the issue or memory or part that is seeking wholeness and love and understanding and used the nervous system to signal out. And I admit, I clicked on a lot of those technique links for a while because we all want a quick fix sometimes (and sometimes that's what's needed for a specific circumstance), but it is a quick fix. But applying those techniques from the repertoire felt superficial and like I was just trying to patch up enough to keep going instead of answering the invitation to connect with the magic of my own vitality and how it was being expressed in that moment. Also, I recently came across psychologist Patricia Crittenden. I've read only bits of her stuff but what stood out for me was (may be paraphrasing badly) that for her, theories of attachment in the US focus on security and assume a safe environment is the norm whereas in Europe attachment takes on board that environments actually usually involve some degree of danger. I've probably mangled her theory but for some reason I resonated with the idea that working to get to safety and to creating a safe end point may be a chimera. There's something liberating in that, at least for me. Thank you again for the beautiful post.
Is there anything better than reading your newsletter, copy-pasting DOZENS OF SENTENCES into a little desktop note because they hit so hard, being too excited to comment and thank you for your writing that it distracts me from fully reading the piece itself so I have to slow down and re-read many parts, AND THEN SEEING MY NAME AT THE BOTTOM OF SAID PIECE. Thank you. I'm tingling.
"No amount of self-care, no matter how skilled, can make up for the fact that the nuclear family unit is a tool of nation states to keep women oppressed, to keep men in positions of power, and to keep the engine of capitalism humming along." Check, check.
Hi there Fanny, another great post, thank you so much. I appreciated the quote from Kai Cheng Thom very much because this has been on my mind a lot lately, reading about techniques for regulating or managing or controlling the nervous system, and I've had the same thought over and over that it feels like control, not listening to. If I realize I'm in flight, I don't want a technique to go to "regulation" because that just puts off trying to connect with myself to ask how I'm feeling that, where I'm feeling it, how do I connect with the part of me that triggered the flight response. The nervous system is the messenger, not the issue or memory or part that is seeking wholeness and love and understanding and used the nervous system to signal out. And I admit, I clicked on a lot of those technique links for a while because we all want a quick fix sometimes (and sometimes that's what's needed for a specific circumstance), but it is a quick fix. But applying those techniques from the repertoire felt superficial and like I was just trying to patch up enough to keep going instead of answering the invitation to connect with the magic of my own vitality and how it was being expressed in that moment. Also, I recently came across psychologist Patricia Crittenden. I've read only bits of her stuff but what stood out for me was (may be paraphrasing badly) that for her, theories of attachment in the US focus on security and assume a safe environment is the norm whereas in Europe attachment takes on board that environments actually usually involve some degree of danger. I've probably mangled her theory but for some reason I resonated with the idea that working to get to safety and to creating a safe end point may be a chimera. There's something liberating in that, at least for me. Thank you again for the beautiful post.
this post was fire! such unflinching truths about capitalism and patriarchy. oh how i felt seen with your words. thank you! 🔥😍🔥
This is a fantastic post.